birds & bird brains

BIRDS:

I don't like flying poop,

and that is why I dislike/hate birds. My bird distrust started right after watching the very famous Alfred Hitchcock film The Birds...After that any large group of birds made me nervous. Then came Resident Evil Extinction, 2 words: zombie crows...large groups of zombie crows...Well, after that movie large groups of birds made me run indoors.

Then all these big McMansions popped up in the valley...I started to notice pigeons on roof tops. I started to notice big brand new houses with bird shit roofs. I wasn't even a home owner back then and that pissed me off. Anything that can fly where ever it wants, shit mid air, and it lands where it lands really pisses me off. I told my mom there would be plenty of poisoned bird seed around my place for those rats with wings...she told me that they were protected by our government. WHAT? Our government can not protect our children from pedophiles or help the homeless but they protect stupid ass pigeons? I'm warning all those that know me, love me, or just read my blog I will be the crazy woman on my roof with a freaking broom or better yet golf club (me yelling FOUR...feathers flying a very Monty Python moment) if pigeons start to gather on or even near my home.

Bird Brains:

disclaimer: I'm agnostic. The ball & chain is atheist...we are raising our children to be free minded & decide what they believe or don't on their own with info but no coaching from us.

I really enjoy the show 17 kids and counting.....Oh not because I find them inspirational....Not because I am floored this woman's nocha hasn't fallen to the floor and crawled away crying like some victim of a sadist. Not for the fact that the husband Jim Bob must be spend all his nights buried in his wife's panties to have so many kids...But for the fact that I'm agnostic, they're beliefs and what they are teaching their children crack me up. The minute one of those kids steps off their "world" and is faced with the "real world" ...Well, it will blow their little minds...You mean the world isn't really like that? "Oh no J______ (all the kids names start with J) there really is no Santa clause." You do have to be careful with that show while I find it hilarious for so many reasons including the very in your face blatant advertising of household products in their home...some like my husband... well the show pisses him off. He grew up with that rubbish (well rubbish to us...don't send me hate mail) so it reminds him of all those things embedded in his noggin where he broke free from. My favorite episode if you want a good laugh is when they go to the Creation Museum....ahhh good times.